Our Quiverfull Journey

I am the oldest of eight children. My parents divorced when I was about a year old. My mother had a total of seven children and my father remarried and had another child. My friends from high school would probably tell you that I was never having children after taking care of all of my siblings for so long. My husband comes from a family of four children. His father, however, is the youngest child of nine siblings. My husband and I knew we wanted a large family but that meant five or maybe six. We were scoffed at for even wanting that many. We were young when we married, 21 and 18, and the “acceptable” large family size at the time was 3-4 children. The “acceptable” family size is considered much smaller today.

We married young and our family was started right away, we had “stair-step” children. Within our first five years of marriage we had four children. When our youngest was about 15 months old, my husband sat trying to figure out how to tell me he thought we had enough. As he sat contemplating this, I gave him what I thought was wonderful news. I was expecting our fifth child. His immediate response was, “That’s it, we’re done.” Needless to say, this did not sit well with me. A month before the baby was born my husband had a vasectomy. I tried to convince myself this was a great idea and even signed the papers for the surgery. I seemed pleased on the outside but I was devastated on the inside. I think my husband felt relief.

As time went on I became more and more upset, especially as I watched my baby grow older. The yearning for another child grew. Guilt and regret seeped in. I began to pray, God please forgive us and change my husband’s heart concerning this.”

God began to bring people into our lives that He would use to show us His truth. There were some with many children who did not use birth control and there were others who had undergone reversals and had been blessed with children following the procedure. They shared with us how God had worked and continued to bless them in regards to childbearing. I began researching the subject and came across a few books at a used book site. They were inexpensive and I bought them. One of these books spoke my heart, so much so that I called and talked with the author. What an encouragement she had been to me. In fact, we discovered that years earlier I had actually lived in the same neighborhood where she lived. If only we had known them back then.

I began to share with my husband the things I was learning. These things were not merely the opinions of others. That would not be enough. What did God have to say about the matter? Their basis in writing, I found, came from the scriptures and I studied the scriptures on these things as well. God was moving and at work.

My husband began to say things like, “I counted all of the children, who’s missing?” or “WOW, it would be cool to have so many blessings!” and even “You know, if we had the money I would consider getting a reversal.”

Well, that last statement got me off to a busy start! It didn’t take me long to find reversal doctors listed on the internet. To my surprise there were a lot of people with the same convictions. We were not alone and some doctors even believed this way. We found a doctor who provided the surgery as a ministry. We were amazed! God had provided a doctor and an extremely low cost surgery; all we had to do was pray for the finances. God again provided.

The surgery went well and we were so excited. We had never had a problem conceiving before and I figured within a month I would be pregnant. As each month passed, however, I would became more and more devastated. My husband finally asked me if another child was going to be the only thing that would make me happy. He reminded me of our obedience to repent not only in word but also deed – having actions of confession and repentance that places this physically not just spiritually back in the hand of God (this is not to say that God is not still sovereign, He is). He asked me if I would be content and trust the Lord whether or not He chose to bless us with another child. After all, it was not about having more children (though that was our desire) it was about submission and obedience.

After much prayer and wrestling, God brought me to that place of peace where contentment flowed. My desire was still to have another child but I was resting in the Sovereign Lord. I had come to terms with the fact that we most likely would not have another child. I began to take comfort in the fact that we had surrendered things back into the hands of God, which ultimately was the whole point. Peace and contentment filled my heart when I surrendered this to the Lord.

The very next day after my surrender, I was taking my morning shower and the smell of the soap made me nauseous. Thinking this was only my mind playing tricks on me or maybe even part of grieving; I took what I deemed would be my last pregnancy test. Even though I believed it to be a big waste of time I went to the pregnancy center. I volunteered at the center and the ladies there had traveled this journey with me. When my friend returned from reading the results she had tears in her eyes and whispered, “It’s positive.”

The Lord blesses those who seek and obey Him. He used this waiting period to bring me to a place of closer communion with Him. To a place were I was content with God and not just His blessings in my life. Once content, He blessed me abundantly with the desires of my heart. The Lord desires that we not only seek and obey but for us to also be content in that obedience.

My husband and I were sure that this would be the final child to be brought forth from my womb and we rejoiced in her! God, however, does so much more that we can ever ask or imagine and we have since been blessed with four more children. That makes a total of five reversal babies so far. Nothing is too great for my God. What He will accomplish in a surrendered, obedient, and contented life is extravagant!

We have experienced trials along the way and I know we will continue to, but isn’t that a part of the surrendered life? The blessings far exceed the irritation and even persecution of the critics!


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Nine Years Ago Today

Nine years ago today I said hello to a sweet little baby girl.  Yes, our Abigail is turning nine today!  She is our first reversal baby.  I will re-post the story of our journey that led to the reversal in a few days. For now, I will simply say she is a child that was prayed for!

She was a most contented baby.   She has a bit more spunk now!  She is a joy!  She is a delight!  She loves to have fun!  She is full of love!  She has a compassionate heart!

I love that sweet and silly girl!

Happy birthday Abigail!  You are such a gift of God!


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Merry Christmas

[The Birth of Jesus Christ]
In those days a decree went out from Caesar Augustus that all the world should be registered. This was the first registration when Quirinius was governor of Syria. And all went to be registered, each to his own town. And Joseph also went up from Galilee, from the town of Nazareth, to Judea, to the city of David, which is called Bethlehem, because he was of the house and lineage of David, to be registered with Mary, his betrothed, who was with child. And while they were there, the time came for her to give birth. And she gave birth to her firstborn son and wrapped him in swaddling cloths and laid him in a manger, because there was no place for them in the inn.
[The Shepherds and the Angels]
And in the same region there were shepherds out in the field, keeping watch over their flock by night. And an angel of the Lord appeared to them, and the glory of the Lord shone around them, and they were filled with fear. And the angel said to them, “Fear not, for behold, I bring you good news of great joy that will be for all the people. For unto you is born this day in the city of David a Savior, who is Christ the Lord. And this will be a sign for you: you will find a baby wrapped in swaddling cloths and lying in a manger.” And suddenly there was with the angel a multitude of the heavenly host praising God and saying,

“Glory to God in the highest,
and on earth peace among those with whom he is pleased!”

When the angels went away from them into heaven, the shepherds said to one another, “Let us go over to Bethlehem and see this thing that has happened, which the Lord has made known to us.” And they went with haste and found Mary and Joseph, and the baby lying in a manger. And when they saw it, they made known the saying that had been told them concerning this child. And all who heard it wondered at what the shepherds told them. But Mary treasured up all these things, pondering them in her heart. And the shepherds returned, glorifying and praising God for all they had heard and seen, as it had been told them.
And at the end of eight days, when he was circumcised, he was called Jesus, the name given by the angel before he was conceived in the womb.
(Luke 2:1-21 ESV)


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Cloth Diapering

Growing up I changed many a diaper.  In fact, I have been changing diapers since I was five years old.  Yes, five years old!  When I changed my siblings we always used the dreaded cloth diapers with the pins and plastic pants.  They were messy, such a pain to clean, and hard of the fingers (too much pricking of the fingers with those pins)!

When I had my first child I considered using cloth diapers because they are supposed to be so much better for the baby’s sensitive skin but I was not going to deal with what I did growing up.  I was going to use a diaper service.  All I would have to do is place them in the smell-sealing pale and each week they would picked up the dirty ones and deliver clean ones.  It was ideal.  The only thing that stopped us from doing so was the cost factor.  It simply cost too much money for a 19 and 21 years old couple barely making it as it was, so we opted for the cheap disposables.

Over the years and with each child I have toyed with the idea of using cloth but in the end it was just always so much easier to use disposable.   Then a few years ago I saw what a cloth diaper looks like these days.  I was AMAZED!  They are almost like disposables now, no pins needed!  I was beginning to seriously consider using them with the baby I was carrying at the time.  My hubby said he didn’t want to use them though.  They stink and the cost up front was not something that he wanted to commit to.  I can understand that.  They are much more expensive now to get the nice ones.  So once again disposables won out.

Well, with our newest little boy I considered it once again but we are just not willing to spend the money.  After all, who knows how many more children we will be blessed with, if any.  Maybe if we had decided to do this a few children ago it would have been a good investment but now I am not so sure.

A friend, who had no idea that I had contemplated this over the years, asked me if I wanted some cloth diapers.  She was no longer using them.  She said I could try them out and see if it was something that would work for us.  I had no reason now to not try them, they were free!  So I have a bunch of snappies, a one size fits all diaper.  I have tried them a few times here at home.  I am not ready to use them when we are out of the house.   After all, it is really cold right now and I am not sure how leak proof they are.

I am not convinced yet but I am trying them on and off.  The main thing that I dislike is how bulky they are!  Unless I have a large outfit on the baby they will stretch out his clothes.  Maybe this will change as he grows bigger I don’t know.  But I figure if I use them a little then it will save a little, after all I didn’t pay anything for them.

Then last week I was contacted by a company to do a review of their cloth diapers!  Hmmm….

I told them I would be glad to do so!  I just received the sample in the mail and to be honest I like them better than what I have been using but will try it a few more times before I make my final determination.  I have seen some diapers online that I think would be ideal for what I would like in a diaper but am once again not sure I want to invest that much yet.

So, here are my questions to those moms out there who do now or have in the past used cloth diapers.  Do you like them?  Which ones do you use?  Likes? Dislikes?  What do you do about the bulkiness under the clothes??  I can see it being easier for a girl who wears dresses but what about the boys?  How do you keep from stretching out their clothes?  Does the bulkiness become less as they grow bigger? Do you find you need to change them more often than you would a disposable?

I will give the review of the new ones I am trying out and let you in on the mystery company that sent me the sample in my next blog post.

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Red-Nosed Caribou

What do you get when you have an Alaskan child who is deprived of secular Christmas stories?  You get to overhear the following  conversation.

My four year old was looking at a piano book earlier this morning and was on the page with the song Rudolf the Red-Nosed Reindeer.  She noticed a drawing of Rudolf.  She pointed to his red nose and then with a bit of urgency and concern she asks,

“What happened to the caribou?!?!?!”

.

.

.

After a short pause she answered her own question.

“Oh, he is blowing a bubble out his nose.”

Rudolph has to hurry up, Christmas is coming s...

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.

Do you think it is time for me to tell her the story??  LOL  Nah, overhearing these conversations is priceless!

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Showered With Prayer

This past weekend the ladies from the church we attend threw a baby shower for the baby and me.  I have had many a baby shower thrown for me and my newborns but this was by far the biggest blessing of them all.  I love these ladies so much!

Everything was perfect!  There was a cute little safari theme with little monkeys,  a dessert made especially for me with my favorite ingredients, and an amazing group of loving ladies to share conversation with!  These ladies are there to share joys and struggles and to offer encouragement.  There were even the adorable little baby gifts!

BUT…….

What I loved most…..

about the day was that this baby shower was not filled with the typical baby shower games.  Those can be fun but that is really all they are.  My friend who organized the shower suggested something completely different.  Instead of playing the usual baby shower games we had a time of group prayer.  I had several prayer requests that I sent to my friend and she shared them with the ladies who attended.  It was so amazing to have such a godly group of ladies praying over me, my newborn son, and the rest of my family!

They prayed for our little Nathan, that he would grow into a strong, godly, young man.  That he would come to know the Lord at an early age and live a life honoring the Lord.  That he would be healthy.  That God would be preparing a godly wife for him even now.  They prayed for me and for my husband as we teach and train him.  That I would be patient even amidst sleepless nights.  That I would have compassion.  That I would not grow weary and that I would rely upon the Lord in the great task of being a parent.  They prayed the same things for my husband as he leads our household.  They prayed for our family with our upcoming move. They prayed for our other children, for our schooling, and for there to be a good relationship cultivated between our newest son and our oldest who has already moved out.

It was such an unbelievably sweet time of prayer!  I do not ever recall people praying for our family in such a way!  It is an amazing blessing that I will always cherish!

I think of all the gifts that we received that day the time of prayer was by far the most special, most desired, and most needed of them all!

As I thank the Lord for my new son and my entire family, I will be thanking him for the church family he has blessed us with.

Thank you Lord for each of those ladies!  Thank you Lord, that we can come before your throne in prayer!

Thank you ladies of Faith PCA Anchorage!  Thank you for showering us with prayer!!!

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