Comments on: My Overactive Super Mommy Syndrome http://mamaarcher.com/2010/02/03/my-overactive-super-mommy-syndrome/ a reformed mama raising many arrows Sun, 14 Aug 2011 19:58:50 +0000 hourly 1 http://wordpress.org/?v=3.2.1 By: Mindy http://mamaarcher.com/2010/02/03/my-overactive-super-mommy-syndrome/comment-page-1/#comment-9622 Mindy Fri, 05 Feb 2010 09:11:29 +0000 http://mamaarcher.com/?p=2536#comment-9622 I can really relate to the control freak comment. I recently stopped homeschooling my children for very good reasons. They are now enrolled at a private Catholic school (a story to go in the comments of your financial provision post!! It's a downright miracle) and I have since realized how much I wanted to control everything and how little I trusted anyone else to be able to teach my children. Also, I have found that it is slightly terrifying to have to speak up when I don't like something and that that may have contributed to my desire to do it all myself. THAT was VERY humbling, as I have always been "super mom" and felt I WAS being "super advocate" by standing up to "the system" and doing it all "my way." I am so thankful for all God is doing in our lives, even though it does not look a thing like I expected it to!! .-= Mindy´s last blog ..<a href="http://underthisroof.blogspot.com/2010/02/candles-and-throats.html" rel="nofollow">Candles and throats</a> =-. I can really relate to the control freak comment. I recently stopped homeschooling my children for very good reasons. They are now enrolled at a private Catholic school (a story to go in the comments of your financial provision post!! It’s a downright miracle) and I have since realized how much I wanted to control everything and how little I trusted anyone else to be able to teach my children. Also, I have found that it is slightly terrifying to have to speak up when I don’t like something and that that may have contributed to my desire to do it all myself. THAT was VERY humbling, as I have always been “super mom” and felt I WAS being “super advocate” by standing up to “the system” and doing it all “my way.” I am so thankful for all God is doing in our lives, even though it does not look a thing like I expected it to!!
.-= Mindy´s last blog ..Candles and throats =-.

]]> By: Claire http://mamaarcher.com/2010/02/03/my-overactive-super-mommy-syndrome/comment-page-1/#comment-9616 Claire Thu, 04 Feb 2010 13:49:37 +0000 http://mamaarcher.com/?p=2536#comment-9616 What a thought provoking post! Cxx .-= Claire´s last blog ..<a href="http://countrymouseclaire.blogspot.com/2010/02/counting-blessings.html" rel="nofollow">Counting blessings</a> =-. What a thought provoking post!

Cxx
.-= Claire´s last blog ..Counting blessings =-.

]]> By: MamaArcher http://mamaarcher.com/2010/02/03/my-overactive-super-mommy-syndrome/comment-page-1/#comment-9613 MamaArcher Thu, 04 Feb 2010 06:10:43 +0000 http://mamaarcher.com/?p=2536#comment-9613 <a href="#comment-9609" rel="nofollow">@Amy @ Raising Arrows</a>, Watch out for the tomato I am about to fling at you! Just kidding, :o) You are right, I do think that there is a bit of "control" issues at play (maybe even trust issues). I work on that but do not always succeed. I liked your point on a false guilt for letting someone down, even if that someone is our self. I never thought of it that way before. @Amy @ Raising Arrows, Watch out for the tomato I am about to fling at you! Just kidding, :o ) You are right, I do think that there is a bit of “control” issues at play (maybe even trust issues). I work on that but do not always succeed.
I liked your point on a false guilt for letting someone down, even if that someone is our self. I never thought of it that way before.

]]> By: Amy @ Raising Arrows http://mamaarcher.com/2010/02/03/my-overactive-super-mommy-syndrome/comment-page-1/#comment-9609 Amy @ Raising Arrows Thu, 04 Feb 2010 03:59:51 +0000 http://mamaarcher.com/?p=2536#comment-9609 Kristine, Apparently, someone thinks I'm "super" b/c I was nominated in that category for the homeschool blog awards. I was more than a little shocked...and flattered. Honestly, I think sometimes our "supermom" status is couched in "control freak" status. ;) WE want to be in control. WE have expectations that sometimes just can't be met. WE don't accept help from others because they might not live up to our standards or be done quite the way we'd like them to be. Or worse yet, WE might be made to feel "less-than in charge" if we rely on someone else. I truly think the guilt is often a false guilt...a self-inflicted guilt we feel for "letting someone down." Even if that someone is really us. OK, so there's my candid answer. I will now commence to duck tomatoes... lol .-= Amy @ Raising Arrows´s last blog ..<a href="http://feedproxy.google.com/~r/blogspot/ssxG/~3/sanM2VrwMI8/blogging-on-budget.html" rel="nofollow">Blogging on a Budget</a> =-. Kristine,
Apparently, someone thinks I’m “super” b/c I was nominated in that category for the homeschool blog awards. I was more than a little shocked…and flattered.

Honestly, I think sometimes our “supermom” status is couched in “control freak” status. ;)

WE want to be in control. WE have expectations that sometimes just can’t be met. WE don’t accept help from others because they might not live up to our standards or be done quite the way we’d like them to be. Or worse yet, WE might be made to feel “less-than in charge” if we rely on someone else.

I truly think the guilt is often a false guilt…a self-inflicted guilt we feel for “letting someone down.” Even if that someone is really us.

OK, so there’s my candid answer. I will now commence to duck tomatoes… lol
.-= Amy @ Raising Arrows´s last blog ..Blogging on a Budget =-.

]]> By: MamaArcher http://mamaarcher.com/2010/02/03/my-overactive-super-mommy-syndrome/comment-page-1/#comment-9604 MamaArcher Wed, 03 Feb 2010 21:55:02 +0000 http://mamaarcher.com/?p=2536#comment-9604 <a href="#comment-9602" rel="nofollow">@Dana</a>, Running to the Lord daily is key! I guess what I find hard is not relinquishing control to the Lord but to other people. It is hard to let others help especially when they tend to have such high expectations of you and when you have even higher expectations of yourself. @Dana, Running to the Lord daily is key! I guess what I find hard is not relinquishing control to the Lord but to other people. It is hard to let others help especially when they tend to have such high expectations of you and when you have even higher expectations of yourself.

]]> By: MamaArcher http://mamaarcher.com/2010/02/03/my-overactive-super-mommy-syndrome/comment-page-1/#comment-9603 MamaArcher Wed, 03 Feb 2010 21:44:26 +0000 http://mamaarcher.com/?p=2536#comment-9603 <a href="#comment-9601" rel="nofollow">@Betty</a>, I so agree with you! I was not saying that I put myself on the status of super mommy, many others tend to do that, I do recognize though that I have the tendency to want everything to be just right. When people do make comments I also try to point them to Christ. Without him I would be nothing and accomplish nothing. @Betty, I so agree with you! I was not saying that I put myself on the status of super mommy, many others tend to do that, I do recognize though that I have the tendency to want everything to be just right. When people do make comments I also try to point them to Christ. Without him I would be nothing and accomplish nothing.

]]> By: Dana http://mamaarcher.com/2010/02/03/my-overactive-super-mommy-syndrome/comment-page-1/#comment-9602 Dana Wed, 03 Feb 2010 21:41:52 +0000 http://mamaarcher.com/?p=2536#comment-9602 There was a time when I loved it when others would be amazed at all I did (or what I thought I did). I had a classic pharisee attitude about what I did, & really believed that if there was anything good in my kids, it was because I was doing such a good job. Surely God would bless us big time from all my "obedience". I lived for the praise of others. Not anymore! Yes, others call me Supermom. But, some call me that just because they know I have 10 kids. Other know that I am in ministry & can't imagine how I get it all done. Those closest to me, know that I am as far from Supermom as you can get! Those are my closest & dearest friends. I am quick to let others know that I never get it all done. There is always something (or many things) that I don't get to do. I just learn to take things one at a time & give priority to the important, rather than the urgent. I have learned to accept help & now am at a place where I have humbled myself to the point of seeking help when I need it. My husband is unemployed going on 14 months now, we have 1 car...our needs are numerous. Someone offered to tutor my daughter to help her prepare for the SAT. A few yrs ago, I would have declined & insisted on doing it myself, not anymore. I gladly accepted the offer for FREE tutoring, and I felt no guilt. That was a big step for me. When I run to my God daily, I do have the strength to accomplish what HE wants me to accomplish & what joy I have knowing that His plan for my kids can never be thwarted. He is in complete control. .-= Dana´s last blog ..<a href="http://danabailey.blogspot.com/2010/01/book-review-dug-down-deep-by-joshua.html" rel="nofollow">Book Review: Dug Down Deep by Joshua Harris</a> =-. There was a time when I loved it when others would be amazed at all I did (or what I thought I did). I had a classic pharisee attitude about what I did, & really believed that if there was anything good in my kids, it was because I was doing such a good job. Surely God would bless us big time from all my “obedience”. I lived for the praise of others. Not anymore!

Yes, others call me Supermom. But, some call me that just because they know I have 10 kids. Other know that I am in ministry & can’t imagine how I get it all done. Those closest to me, know that I am as far from Supermom as you can get! Those are my closest & dearest friends.

I am quick to let others know that I never get it all done. There is always something (or many things) that I don’t get to do. I just learn to take things one at a time & give priority to the important, rather than the urgent.

I have learned to accept help & now am at a place where I have humbled myself to the point of seeking help when I need it. My husband is unemployed going on 14 months now, we have 1 car…our needs are numerous.

Someone offered to tutor my daughter to help her prepare for the SAT. A few yrs ago, I would have declined & insisted on doing it myself, not anymore. I gladly accepted the offer for FREE tutoring, and I felt no guilt. That was a big step for me.

When I run to my God daily, I do have the strength to accomplish what HE wants me to accomplish & what joy I have knowing that His plan for my kids can never be thwarted. He is in complete control.
.-= Dana´s last blog ..Book Review: Dug Down Deep by Joshua Harris =-.

]]> By: Betty http://mamaarcher.com/2010/02/03/my-overactive-super-mommy-syndrome/comment-page-1/#comment-9601 Betty Wed, 03 Feb 2010 21:26:26 +0000 http://mamaarcher.com/?p=2536#comment-9601 I don't think of myself as a super mommy, in fact I attempt to keep my thoughts away from that. I have always told my children that the only "REAL" superhero is God, therefore, by thinking I am a super mommy,I would be telling them that I believe I have super hero status. I want them focused on their super hero God not some assumed super hero mommy that always falls short. I have had others tell me that I am a SUPERMOM, but I always attempt to help them understand that I would not be the mom that I am without God. I feel guilty when I fall short in the patience department, but not typically because I didn't get everything done. I tend to believe that my to do list, probably does not match God's to do list for me. So, I make sure to try and follow His list, therefore eliminating the guilt of my to do list being incomplete. I perfection tendencies tend to be along the lines of having everything homemade, and perfecting curriculum to each child. With six children that can be difficult. My oldest two are polar opposites in where they struggle. So, again I have to turn back to my super hero God--where I should have been anyway--to find the right balance. .-= Betty´s last blog ..<a href="http://feedproxy.google.com/~r/PeaceCreekOnThePrairie/~3/83xJEPShsGE/wordless-wednesday.html" rel="nofollow">Wordless Wednesday</a> =-. I don’t think of myself as a super mommy, in fact I attempt to keep my thoughts away from that. I have always told my children that the only “REAL” superhero is God, therefore, by thinking I am a super mommy,I would be telling them that I believe I have super hero status. I want them focused on their super hero God not some assumed super hero mommy that always falls short.

I have had others tell me that I am a SUPERMOM, but I always attempt to help them understand that I would not be the mom that I am without God.

I feel guilty when I fall short in the patience department, but not typically because I didn’t get everything done. I tend to believe that my to do list, probably does not match God’s to do list for me. So, I make sure to try and follow His list, therefore eliminating the guilt of my to do list being incomplete. I perfection tendencies tend to be along the lines of having everything homemade, and perfecting curriculum to each child. With six children that can be difficult. My oldest two are polar opposites in where they struggle. So, again I have to turn back to my super hero God–where I should have been anyway–to find the right balance.
.-= Betty´s last blog ..Wordless Wednesday =-.

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