Aiming High

I have been called several things in my life; some good and some not good. Earlier this week I was called something that I had never been called before. It is something that I was so amazed, stunned, shocked, and bewildered to hear. I was called (in a good tone) an over achiever! I am somewhat baffled that I appeared to this lady to be that way. In fact, I even told her that I found it strange that she would think so because I constantly feel as if I am missing the mark and always falling short. Is that the way over achievers feel?

I realize that I do have a lot on my plate and I probably place much more on my plate than I should but I never feel as if I have done anything well enough or achieved enough. I do tend to aim high and have some lofty goals but I very rarely reach them. I know that it is good to have goals that are broken down into tasks that can be accomplished but to also aim higher at the same time. So I do have high standards in some areas; not so high in others but like I said I personally do not see the accomplishment.

Even when growing up I had high standards and was even told that I needed to lower them. (not a good confidence booster there) I always felt as if there was more out there and a better life to be had. That God had a better design for my life than the then current situation I found myself in. Only at that time I did not realize it as the calling of the Lord.

I guess I have always seen over achievers not merely being those who aim high but those who actually achieve what they are aiming at and more. I think we all should aim high and have high standards. Especially the Christian. What higher aim is there than to reach for and seek after Christlikeness and godliness? I am keenly aware of how far I have to go and how much I need to grow. To have one say that I am an over achiever and for others to recognize that I have achieved something still baffles me. The only accomplishments I have are not my own but the grace of God in my life. I have not achieved but God has been at work. I have not reached my lofty goals but rather miss the mark over and over. I simply continue to aim higher and higher. Does that make one an over achiever or simply one on a journey?

Holding Back Tears

There have been several things this week that have caused me to try and hold back tears. Many of them are on a related subject, marriage. I am so thankful and so blessed to have the husband that I do. We have been blessed with a wonderful marriage. It is not one without struggles, every marriage takes work. We have a great God and have been blessed abundantly. It almost brings me to tears of joy to think of the abundance of grace, mercy, strength, and blessings the Lord has provided us in our marriage.   A cousin of mine recently celebrated 23 years of marriage!  In my family that is unbelievable!!!  I know some of the struggles they have gone through and know of the amazing working of God in their lives.  As I think upon this tears of joy begin to well up inside of me!

However, this week I received news of the pending divorce of some dear, dear friends of ours.  You hear of how divorce is just as common in the church; nothing makes that more strikingly evident than to realize that you know those who are going through it.  Tears of brokenheartedness for our friends well up inside. 

Tears for the state of the church are also building.  In the desire to minister to those of divorce, accountability and shame have been removed.  Yes, I said shame.  We are not to be shaming others but sin should carry shame.  Sin is shameful.  We are to hold others accountable.  This (holding others accountable) should be a part of our ministry to those who are struggling.  God desires reconciliation and provides the way and the healing.  It is not an easy road but how great and big is God??? 

In my husband’s line of work, he sees almost on a daily basis marriages falling apart.  It makes us more thankful for our own.   I have been contemplating this week my many tears.  Maybe it is just hormonal (my usual excuse-LOL) but maybe, just maybe, it is as it should be.  We should be in a place where we are brokenhearted and mourn over the sinfulness of this world, we should be brokenhearted and mourn when Christians choose the path of the world rather than God’s plan, and we should well up and cry tears of joy for the great, great God we serve and his many mercies toward us.

Science–Another Giveaway

 Volume 3 – The Human Body, begins with an introductory song on cells, genes, tissue, organs, and organ systems. Then it focuses on each of the body systems.

Included in this giveaway is the teacher book, song cd, and two student workbooks.

To enter post a link on your blog about this giveaway and mention something that you like about this blog.  Then come and leave me a comment to let me know that you have done so.  The last day for entries is May 31st and the winner will be announced on June 1st.

Saying Goodbye

Last year was a very hard year for me in many respects.  One of those wounds is becoming fresher by the day.  Last year one of my grandmothers passed away.  I did not know until afterwards.  I have dealt with the anger of not receiving a call until afterwards, wishing I could have seen her before she passed rather than it having been 10 years earlier.  I did go to visit the remaining family about  4 months later and picked up a few things that were passed on to me.  During the course of that trip I stopped to visit other family including another grandmother.  I am so thankful for that visit!  This other grandmother has cancer.  It was a very brief visit and it was difficult to actually “visit” as there was so much family around.  But I was able to hug her and tell her that I loved her.

I received word this week that the cancer has grown and she only has about 3-6 weeks left.  I sat down yesterday to writer her a card and just broke down in tears of grief.  I am almost wondering which is better….living with the regret and longing of having missed seeing my grandmother before her death (like the one grandmother) OR (actually having to say goodbye (like the other grandmother).  Then I find myself wondering if the easier is really the better or not.  Maybe dealing with grief one way makes the other way seem easier simply because it has passed and is not as fresh.  I do not know.  All I know is that my heart is aching once again and I am once again typing a blog post in tears.

Please pray for my family.  I am thankful that the Lord is the one who weighs the heart.  I am praying that my grandmother will be among the redeemed.  I do not have that confidence so please pray for her.  Pray for comfort in the weeks ahead.  Thank you all!

Nothing or More

It is often said in the Church that we are nothing without Christ.  I agree with it to an extent because I understand the point that is trying to be made but I wonder if that perspective is stopping a bit short.  It seems easy to me to say that we are an empty glass just waiting for the Lord to fill.  This approach means that we are simply lacking something.  It is true that as a non-believer we lack Christ in our lives and without him we lack any good thing.  I believe, however, that even taking that approach gives too much credit to ourselves.  It lends itself to the cultural mindset that we are generally good people. 

To have a more accurate comprehension of our position before the Lord we must have a clearer understanding of who we are and who he his.  The more we realize our depravity the more clearly we see God’s complete holiness.  We are not basically good people who JUST need God to fill us with his holiness.  We are not just nothing, we are more than nothing.  We are not just void of goodness and an empty cup waiting to be filled.  We are a cup full of sin.  We not only need God to fill our cup but he needs to clean it out first! 

Rather than saying we are nothing without Christ maybe we should be saying we are nothing but unredeemed sinful creatures without Christ.  We need to remember that we NEEDED GOD to save us because 1) we could not save ourselves and 2) we are sinful creatures who are indeed in need of a Savior to begin with.

What are your thoughts on the empty glass verses a glass full of sinfulness…………

Almost There…….

Wow, what a day!  Today as I a woke from a slumber that was not long enough and drug myself out of bed, I realized that today was going to be another busy day!  Such is my life and I do love it yet there are some days when I just would like a day off to sleep and rejouvenate! 

Today my baby is now 6 months old!  Where has the time gone?  Busyness seems to steal the hours, days, weeks, and months away.  I am rejoicing that my little lady is so healthy and doing new things each and every day and a little saddened that she is not going to be little and cuddly for too much longer. 

We are in the home stretch with school right now and trying like mad to get finished.  We do not want to spend our long summer days indoors with the books when we could be out enjoying Alaska.  We should be finished by the end of May except for the older two children who will only have one subject left.  We have one more piano lesson and a recital this weekend then we will break for the summer.

My hubby comes home this weekend and we are so anxious to see him!  It has been a long 5 weeks!  Which leads me to all of the projects that I wanted to get accomplished before his plane arrives.  Well…….by the end of today, the list will be mostly complete!  There are a few extra things that I have added to the list so that will make up for the one or two that I have just decided not to worry about.  Please pray for me today that I can clean off this plate of mine.  Then I can relax a little before hubby arrives.  I do not want to be a frazzled mess when he come home!

I know blogging has been sporatic as of late but I am busy, the weather is AMAZING, and the sunshine lasts, and last, and lasts, so to be perfectly honest……..I would rather be outside with my family than strapped to my computer. 

So, are you all geared up for the summer?  Are you finished with school? What is on your projects list???  Or am I just the only one who is crazy busy???