Our Quiverfull Jouney
I am the oldest of eight children. My parents divorced when I was about a year old. My mother had a total of seven children and my father remarried and had another child. My friends from high school would probably tell you that I was never having children after taking care of all of my siblings for so long. My husband comes from a family of four children. His father, however, is the youngest child of nine siblings. My husband and I knew we wanted a large family but that meant five or maybe six. We were scoffed at for even wanting that many. We were young when we married, 21 and 18, and the “acceptable” large family size at the time was 3-4 children. The “acceptable” family size is considered much smaller today.
We married young and our family was started right away, we had “stair-step” children. Within our first five years of marriage we had four children. When our youngest was about 15 months old, my husband sat trying to figure out how to tell me he thought we had enough. As he sat contemplating this, I gave him what I thought was wonderful news. I was expecting our fifth child. His immediate response was, “That’s it, we’re done.” Needless to say, this did not sit well with me. A month before the baby was born my husband had a vasectomy. I tried to convince myself this was a great idea and even signed the papers for the surgery. I seemed pleased on the outside but I was devastated on the inside. I think my husband felt relief.
As time went on I became more and more upset, especially as I watched my baby grow older. The yearning for another child grew. Guilt and regret seeped in. I began to pray, God please forgive us and change my husband’s heart concerning this.”
God began to bring people into our lives that He would use to show us His truth. There were some with many children who did not use birth control and there were others who had undergone reversals and had been blessed with children following the procedure. They shared with us how God had worked and continued to bless them in regards to childbearing. I began researching the subject and came across a few books at a used book site. They were inexpensive and I bought them. One of these books spoke my heart, so much so that I called and talked with the author. What an encouragement she had been to me. In fact, we discovered that years earlier I had actually lived in the same neighborhood where she lived. If only we had known them back then.
I began to share with my husband the things I was learning. These things were not merely the opinions of others. That would not be enough. What did God have to say about the matter? Their basis in writing, I found, came from the scriptures and I studied the scriptures on these things as well. God was moving and at work.
My husband began to say things like, “I counted all of the children, who’s missing?” or “WOW, it would be cool to have so many blessings!” and even “You know, if we had the money I would consider getting a reversal.”
Well, that last statement got me off to a busy start! It didn’t take me long to find reversal doctors listed on the internet. To my surprise there were a lot of people with the same convictions. We were not alone and some doctors even believed this way. We found a doctor who provided the surgery as a ministry. We were amazed! God had provided a doctor and an extremely low cost surgery; all we had to do was pray for the finances. God again provided.
The surgery went well and we were so excited. We had never had a problem conceiving before and I figured within a month I would be pregnant. As each month passed, however, I would became more and more devastated. My husband finally asked me if another child was going to be the only thing that would make me happy. He reminded me of our obedience to repent not only in word but also deed – having actions of confession and repentance that places this physically not just spiritually back in the hand of God. He asked me if I would be content and trust the Lord whether or not He chose to bless us with another child. After all, it was not about having more children (though that was our desire) it was about submission and obedience.
After much prayer and wrestling, God brought me to that place of peace where contentment flowed. My desire was still to have another child but I was resting in the Sovereign Lord. I had come to terms with the fact that we most likely would not have another child. I began to take comfort in the fact that we had surrendered things back into the hands of God, which ultimately was the whole point. Peace and contentment filled my heart when I surrendered this to the Lord.
The very next day after my surrender, I was taking my morning shower and the smell of the soap made me nauseous. Thinking this was only my mind playing tricks on me or maybe even part of grieving; I took what I deemed would be my last pregnancy test. Even though I believed it to be a big waste of time I went to the pregnancy center. I volunteered at the center and the ladies there had traveled this journey with me. When my friend returned from reading the results she had tears in her eyes and whispered, “It’s positive.”
The Lord blesses those who seek and obey Him. He used this waiting period to bring me to a place of closer communion with Him. To a place were I was content with God and not just His blessings in my life. Once content, He blessed me abundantly with the desires of my heart. The Lord desires that we not only seek and obey but for us to also be content in that obedience.
My husband and I were sure that this would be the final child to be brought forth from my womb and we rejoiced in her! God, however, does so much more that we can ever ask or imagine and we have since been blessed with two more children. That makes a total of three reversal babies so far. Nothing is too great for my God. What He will accomplish in a surrendered, obedient, and contented life is extravagant!
We have experienced trials along the way and I know we will continue to, but isn’t that a part of the surrendered life? The blessings far exceed the irritation and even persecution of the critics!
Posted in Christianity, Family, Quiverfull, Quiverfull Carnival
January 13th, 2008 at 8:53 am
It’s always amazing to me to see so many similarities in QF stories. Your story almost be written by me! It just confirms to me that it is GOD who is doing the moving, rather than human will. LOVE it!
I think the hardest part of the journey for all of us is accepting God’s will for when we’re done. That will be a hard day when I realize that God has closed my womb. I will be 40 this year and wonder if it’s not too far off, and then I remember Doug Phillips saying that his mother had a baby at 48! How kewl is that?
Love,
Becca
January 13th, 2008 at 9:19 am
Becca- you are so correct. I Lord reaffirms this to me over and over again when I see the way in which He works in the lives of others. I think we need to be in prayer for contentment when the time of the closing of our wombs comes. I agree that will be a test as well. I think that one of the ladies wrote about that on her blog as well. I think it was Christi from “where creek meets lake” blog. You will have to look for that when I get the “not-a-real-carnival” carnival post up.
January 13th, 2008 at 11:02 am
Very touching testimony, Thanks so much for sharing this. We will be writing ours tomorrow.
God Bless,
The Wilkinson Clan
http://www.simplelivingak.wordpress.com
January 13th, 2008 at 2:50 pm
Awesome! God is so very good, and it’s just wonderful to hear the different ways He works in our lives to bring us where He wants. Thanks for sharing!
January 13th, 2008 at 4:50 pm
To be honest, I believe family size is growing again. I know of one couple in their mid to late forties and a they have five children. Our daughther and her husband have 4. Several of their friends have 3 or 4 children. I think this is becoming the norm, rather than the 2 and done philosophy of the 70′s & 80′s. May the Lord bless you with your hearts desire.
January 13th, 2008 at 7:22 pm
What a wonderful testimony of how God provides for our desires after we have given ourselves fully and wholly over to him! May God continue to bless you greatly!
January 14th, 2008 at 2:04 am
Yeah!!! This is the story i wanted to read. What a great testimony and story to share. Thanks. Lots of personal information, but great stuff!!! I’m so thrilled for you… will you have nine???
Valerie
January 14th, 2008 at 4:07 am
What a great testimony! How good of the Lord!
January 14th, 2008 at 5:38 am
Oh that is soooo awesome.God can do anything. these wee ones are wonderful. We just came back from a get together at a friends home and I believe there had to be 45children there and 7 families
January 14th, 2008 at 5:56 am
Psalm 127~those get togethers are always so much fun!!
Valerie~9?? That is in the Lord’s hands! You will be one of the first to know if I do though!
January 15th, 2008 at 1:42 am
We currently have 5. Our youngest is now 7 years old and we had a reversal in October 2006. We are still practicing trusting and obedience, but hoping that more children are part of God’s plan for us!
I loved reading this story. It made hope spring up in my heart once more!
January 15th, 2008 at 4:04 am
Christina~ Thank you for commenting. I pray that God would continue to be at work in your life and that you are steadfast in your trust and obedience to Him!
Blessings!
Kristine
January 15th, 2008 at 5:02 am
Thanks for posting this. My husband and I have two kids, 6 and 4. Our youngest has Autism and right before his struggles began we had a miscarriage. Through prayer we decided to have a vasectomy. Now that it has been 2 1/2 years, my husband actually commented to me that he wished we’d waited. I had been praying the very same prayer. I did a little research but found out our insurance does not cover it and it is much, much more than we can afford. I just left it to the Lord. How great that He does make a way where there needs to be one!
January 15th, 2008 at 5:19 am
The Lord provides the way for the things He calls us to. Praise God!
As a note for any interested in…For reversal doctors who provide surgery for less than other doctors as a ministry visit:
http://blessedarrows.com/
January 15th, 2008 at 5:25 am
Blessed Arrows also helps financially assist those seeking reversals.
January 15th, 2008 at 5:20 pm
Lord reaffirms this to me over and over again when I see the way in which He works in the lives of others
January 17th, 2008 at 6:57 pm
Thank you for writing such ageat testimony, my husband is booked in for a reversal next month so are praying for God’s grace and mercy. It has taken a long time for us to get the money together for this and its been 10 years so we are praying that God will bless and that we will have contentment for whatever He decides. We were put under so much pressure by families to have the op orinally because we were expecting a fourth child and one of our other children had multiple problems. Our youngest also has problems but the way these guys are and effect they have on others is amazing…how we allowed ourselves to cut off God’s blessing is just so awfull for us.
Thank you for such a testomony…may it make others think….
Blessing to you and your family
Shelley P
from over the pond..
January 17th, 2008 at 7:20 pm
Shelley- thank you for your little mini-testimony!! Pressure from others is often so strong. May others be encouraged not to give in to it but to seek the Lord in this area because of what you have shared!
Blessings,
Kristine
November 9th, 2008 at 3:11 pm
I just happened upon your blog, not really sure from where, but your story is touching me. I am pregnant with our third child and my husband is feeling overwhelmed with the responsibility of taking care of the ones we already have. He has been saying little things about how this should be our last and then finally last week, he said he wanted to have a vasectomy after this baby was born. This is just something I cannot hear while pregnant. I feel he does not want this baby and he is fearful and I am praying the Lord would change both our hearts to his will concerning having more children, but I am heartbroken. Of course part of me thinks how easy it would be to only have three, but then the other part of me thinks, how can I decide not to meet another little person who God might want to give us. It’s been a week since he has made his intentions known and he has gone on to say how stressed he is to care for us all financially…obviously there is more here than just not wanting more children, ultimately my husband isn’t fully trusting Christ to supply all our need in every circumstance….I guess I just wanted to say, your story gives me some hope that maybe God will change my husband’s heart. Thanks for sharing.
December 29th, 2008 at 1:05 am
I am striving for contentment as well after feeling I would conceive soon after our reversal. How long did it take you to conceive?
December 29th, 2008 at 3:07 am
Thank you for sharing this story. I needed to hear it.
January 23rd, 2009 at 8:55 am
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